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Dear Sassy

Sweetheart, you need to realize that you’re 2 years old.  Actually you won’t be 2 until next week.  This means that you are not a grown up, and you cannot cook on your own.  Today’s results of your inability to come to terms with your age are the following:

1.  You decided to break an egg open like a big girl, with a fork like the big girls do.  However, you broke the egg over the kitchen carpet, not over a bowl.  You then carried off the remaining eggs and acted like nothing had happened.  However, carrying the remaining eggs with you merely alerted me to an egg infraction having occurred and I knew exactly who had done it.

2.  While making pizza tonight, I simply could not find the cornmeal.  I looked everywhere I could have put it, and Daddy checked through the trash to make sure that you hadn’t thrown it away.  But you hadn’t thrown it away, had you, Sass?  Having looked everywhere else, I thought to myself “if I were a 2 year old girl, where would I put cornmeal?”  You almost always do things that make sense in some way, so it occurred to me to check your room.  There it was, my container of cornmeal sitting in YOUR kitchen pantry.

Sassy, I appreciate that you try to help.  It’s always sweet to see you trying to get stuff set up for meals, even pulling out the right number of plates and eating utensils.  HOWEVER, there are some things you can’t quite do yet on your own.  So sweetheart, please stop taking my cooking things.  I won’t take things from your kitchen if you don’t take things from mine…

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